tubby

Who first thought filming fat people leak sweat and tears - and last night on The Biggest Loser puke - makes good prime time TV? Should I spend time thinking about them I guess I would feel sorry for these mammoth individuals. For whatever reasons (I wasn't paying much attention) they have become morbidly obese and feel they can only turn their lives around by having hard-bodied fit-freaks shouting at them and asking if they know whether a Magnum ice cream has more or fewer calories than a bag of potato crisps (more, but not as many more as you may think.) They wear enormous t-shirts with their enormous weight emblazoned on the front. This is voyueristic nonesense of the most nonsensical type. We only watch it to see fat people get beasted and break down and to go eeurrgghhh! as we see their wobbly layers folding over top of their pants. I assume the fat folks are not stupid. So seeing a bloke confess he does not want to die before his kids is touching, but fucking hell, why do you need to do it on tele? Isn't not dieing before your kids motivation enough to sort it out? Who wants to die before their kids? Or the day you had to use a machine to ensure you breathe as you sleep; there's a clue in there somehere. Surely,fat people know they are killing themselves? Either they have the strength to sort it out or they don't. And for some in the don't group I think that is a mental health issue, not a physical health one. Sort that out. I am not sure that being made to sweat your arse and tits off each week on prime time TV is going to offer much long term help. Other than to the programmers who know that the masses will lap this stuff up.

Another thing. It is getting increasingly easy to be labelled a hero. If a fat person loses a few kg on tele they're a hero. Back in my grandad's era you had to jump on a grenade or drag a mate to safety through a minefield before you became a hero. By the time I have kids you'll be a hero for farting without shitting yourself.

Also watched a bit of Bondi Rescue last night. Fly on the wall stuff following the lifeguards at Bondi. Not as bad as a lot of FotW stuff. English bloke swept off a sandbank and needs rescuing. He's rescued. All good. His missus, afterwards when the were being interviewed on the beach, was topless and that was not so good. You're on tele love, you ain't all that, cover your tits up.

Back to fatness. I cooked kangaroo steaks for dinner last night. Tasty stuff and very lean. A bit of mash and a few veggies. Probably fewer calories than a Magnum and apack of crisps. And yes, I did cook dinner last night. Sal has flu ("don't you mean Sal has flown?" baddum-cha!) and therefore is not touching food. Unfortunately for Rumpole that seemed to extended to dog food. A mix-up; I left early for my eye doc, did not feed him and assumed Sal would, just as she assumed I had. No wonder he was destroying Sal's flip-flops (thongs to the Australians.) Probably licking skin cells from them, poor little bastard.

I hope the alert noticed two uses of the word fewer some people would have used the word less. My grammar, spelling and typing are shit. But I still possess a shit list of things that shit me in the written and spoken word. The use of the word less when I believe the word fewer should have been used is on such shitter. And don't get me started on that I/me thing.

New menu items at McDonald's in Australia and they are - genuinely - healthy. Er. But get ths...

However, the real health benefits would come through convincing people to substitute this typical fast food order (Big Mac, fries and a drink) with, for example, the tick-approved meal of lean beef burger, garden salad and orange juice. This would result in a 70 per cent reduction in saturated fat, a third less salt and half the kilojoules.

If just 10 per cent of customers make such a swap, collectively they will remove 294 tonnes of saturated fat from their diet each year, according to the foundation.

I wonder what 294 tonnes of saturated fat look like? probably like the starting lineup of the Biggest Loser.