Driving in Australia

Red Lights
When approaching a set of traffic lights that are about to turn red you should - actually you must - accelerate. Do not worry if you do fail to pass through the lights before they turn to red; Australian road rules allow the first two cars arriving at a red traffic light to drive straight through. If the first car approaching a red light slows or stops the second is required by law to swerve around it and pass through. The driver of the swerving car is expected to blast his car's horn or shout loudly at the stopped driver to let them know they are in the wrong. Pedestrains, cyclists and other drivers can be ignored as they have no rights in this situation.

Bike Lanes
Cycle lanes do not exist in Australia. Many roads have a white cycle painted on them. This should not be mistaken for a bike lane. Councils will be returning to paint a red circle with a line through it on top of these painted cycles. This "No Cycling" sign will eventually be painted on all Australian roads.

Indicators
Indicators are fitted to vehicles only to enable these vehicles to meet standards required overseas. There is no requirement to use a cars indicator lights to indicate your intention to change lane or turn. Try leaving your indicator on for a little green disco-light in your car's cabin. The tic-tac tic-tac sound is a pleasant accompaniment to many popular songs.

Turning Right
Car drivers have the right of when turning right across the path of an approaching cyclist. Remember - cyclists are not real road users and will be banned from all roads once we get enough red paint. Van and Ute drivers have the right of way over all other vehicles.

Mirrors
As with indicators, mirrors need not be used in Australia. As a modern, progressive country Australia has no interest in what is behind. In Sydney the driver's rear view mirror is used mainly to gaze longingly at oneself. Wing mirrors are a status symbol; if you have late 90s BMW M3 wing mirrors fitted to your Honda Civic you ARE King Shit. NEVER look in your wing mirror before opening a car door.

Parking
You are allowed to park anywhere you like in Australia. There are some outdated laws still on the books that may remain for some time, but as enforcement has been removed they can be ignored. Updates will be made to most road signage while painting the "No Cycling" signs. The words "Bus Lane", "Cycle Path", "No Parking" and those crazy yellow criss cross patterns will be removed or replaced with the word "Parking." I have no idea who created those "disabled" and "mother and baby" parking bays. They are not legal and you shoudl use these parking spots first. They are the best spots and Australian drivers deserve the best.